Jan 29, 2016 - 10:37 AM
I can't say this is an end-all recommendation, but an effective tool I have used is posting a copy of a very clear agreement in a common place (usually the refrigerator.) I do this most often for seniors who have made the decision to move to Assisted Living and may forget during the coordination process. By posting an agreement on the refrigerator that has the signature of family, myself and, most importantly, the senior we create a tool that then is a reference point when situations like yours arise.
I think it is worth a shot for you. Print up a simple paragraph on why mom cannot drive and that the car is being safely cared for. Create signature lines for you, other family, the physicians AND your mom. Simple, kind and reassuring are the goals. When it is complete, gather those signatures and go over it with your mom. If at all possible, get her to also sign it. When that is done, keep the original VERY SAFE and make as many copies as you need. Post one in the clearest space you can refer to - usually the refrigerator. Then, when your mom calls, you can calmly explain that you have all decided together to not have the car and refer her to the note as verifiable proof that you are speaking the truth.
Hope it helps! Would love to read any other recommendations to this question.