Dec 15, 2015 - 09:20 AM
First of all,I want to say Kudos to you for being the careigver for your mother in law for such a long time. Caregiver burnout is not uncommon. You may have several options available to you depending on where you live. I would first suggest you contact your county's Agency on Aging. You mother in law may be eligible for several waiver programs that may provide temporary respite for her, and for you. Additionally, you may be eligible to get paid for being her caregiver. Through waiver programs the state can pay you, or another designated caregiver, to provide care. The waiver program will connect you to a Service Coordination Agency that will help you identify the kinds of services and supports that your mother in law, you , and your family may need. They will also be able to provide you with a caregiver to help lighten the burden that you now carry. Stay strong and take care of yourself. You are doing a wonderful job.
Dec 16, 2015 - 12:22 PM
I suggest that you provide your husband with a couple realistic alternatives along with a deadline. After the deadline, make it clear that she is no longer your responsibility or you will automatically place her somewhere. Then, stick to it. If the rest of the family has serious issues with your decision, they can take care of the responsibility themselves.
Feel good and proud of your caregiving role. Don't let them make you feel guilty or ashamed for wanting it to end.