Jun 04, 2015 - 10:53 AM
When I was an administratror I invited families who needed to see their loved ones (for their own peace of mind) to use my office, which was glass enclosed) during activity hours where they could view their loved one interacting with others without interacting with them themselves.
If you feel like he is 'declining' talk to the nurse or administration about what they see with him when you aren't around. When he sees loved ones he may 'remember' he isn't living with them or at home and you may see some sadness that the caregivers or administration don't see during the day when he is active and interacting with others.
I am happy to answer any more questions if you face obstacles along the way that may help ease your mind. You are doing the right thing for BOTH of you and it just takes time for you both to adjust to a new situation. When you do visit him for the first time try and plan your visit around an activity that he enjoys and that will help with 'conversation'. He will also feed off your emotions...if you are sad he will feel something is 'wrong' and may mimic your feelings. If he senses you are confident and happy he will likely follow suit, again this will all come with time as you both adjust.
Oct 26, 2015 - 11:23 AM
There were definnitely doubts about whether I was doing the right thing, but I had to keep coming back to what was really best for mom. Part of what's difficult, I think, is that at some point as a caregiver for one's parent, you have to go from trying to be a child that pleases and lives for praise to being the "adult" who makes tough choices. And that's hard for everyone.
I've also come to believe that it'll never be easy, and I shouldn't expect that at some point it'll be smooth sailing--even though I catch myself hoping that on a regular basis. Mom having Alzheimer's will always suck, and never a picnic for anyone. I'm happy to be proven wrong! But more likely, she'll never stop getting angry and upset and blaming me--I just hope that we can keep those times to a minimum and, meanwhile, have her be safe and relatively happy.
May 28, 2016 - 07:40 AM
May 28, 2016 - 11:13 AM