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How can I get dad to wear depends?

He will change his pants after an accident and clean up the mess but it would be so much easier if we could just prevent the mess in the first place. When I bring the subject up he just gets mad and leaves the room.
Status: Open    Apr 29, 2015 - 06:45 AM


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2 answers


May 08, 2015 - 01:59 PM

This is a hard thing for many seniors to accept, role reversal, especially the discussion of incontinence. While ailing they still see themselves as the PARENT in the relationship and therefore the one who should be doing the caregiving and directing. It may be a good idea to provide the necessary supplies to him if he is capable of managing the needs on his own and quietly checking the status of the supplies after a week or so (has he used them, are they still available, etc). Admitting that one is in need of assistance is a difficult thing at any age but especially a parent to child.

It might be a good idea to attend a doctor's appointment with him and preface the physician's nurse ahead of time about the issue that the doctor may be able to bring it up, benefits of use, etc. Sometimes it's a simple as a third party mention to make it click!

May 10, 2015 - 02:34 PM

I wonder if you replaced some of his underwear with Depends and just put them in the drawer would he use them then.
It just might be that he is embarrased that you brought it up.
If he was able to just take them out of the drawer just like always and just like "real" underwear he just might be a little more at ease with it.
When you notice he is running a bit low just replace more in the drawer.
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