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How do I convince my mom to allow outside help?

I'm not sure if her reaction is due to a mistrust of strangers, trying to prove she is still capable or feels that having outside help would be an invasion of her privacy.
Status: Open    Apr 14, 2015 - 12:32 AM


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Apr 28, 2016 - 07:36 AM

One of the best ways to get around this challenge is to help her to build a relationship with the person that is providing the assistance. One way to do this is to start off lightly. For instance, if there is an appointment coming up, or some task that she depends upon a family member to complete, let her know that the family is not available, but there is a nice person that will take your place. Paint this in a positive light! Assuming you can get her to cooperate for "this one occasion", it will be a good opportunity for her to get to know the helper. And if all goes well, you will likely find that she is more receptive in the future. Bottom line, start slowly, allow some trust to build, and then add to the schedule as needed.


May 03, 2015 - 06:58 AM

I am sure it is a bit of all three of the reasons that you list.
How much help does she need?
If it is just a bit of cleaning once a week why not get a company to come in as a "Mother's Day gift" for her. If once a week is more than she needs twice a month could be done.
If it is meal preparation and checking in on her Meals on Wheels would come in and bring a meal and make sure that she is alright and that she has eaten what was brought previously.
If she needs more help it sounds like you are looking for a Caregiver and that would be a little more "Invasive" and may take a little more adjusting. You could start with 2 or 3 times a week and see how it goes. Like all "partnerships" personality plays a big roll and it would be a good idea for both of you to interview potential caregivers just so you can see the interaction.
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