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Is my son safe with his grandfather?

My dad has dementia & has gotten very aggressive with everyone except my 5 year old son. I'm torn between letting Dad spend time with him and worrying about my son's safety.
Status: Open    Dec 05, 2014 - 02:04 PM

Dementia, Relationships

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2 answers


Mar 01, 2015 - 07:59 AM

Obviously you would not leave your son alone with your Dad but I think the time spent with Grandpa is good for your son and I the the time spent with your son is good for your Dad.
Let your son know that sometimes Grandpa can get angry and if Grandpa does anything that scares him he should come and tell you right away.
If you know the "triggers" that might make your Dad angry try to avoid them, keep visits short and at a good time of day for your Dad.
Your first responsibility is to your son and his safety and if your Dad is aware you need to keep stressing this. If at anytime he becomes angry you need to take your son and go. (if possible) Tell your Dad that the behaviour was unacceptable and you will come back again when he is calmer. Then leave.
Tell your son that nothing he did made his Grandpa angry it is the disease he has that makes Grandpa get angry.


Jul 13, 2016 - 09:53 AM

Agitation and Agression are seen in up to 80% of patients with Alzheimers disease. It can be lessened/treated with or without medication. First, you want to make sure he does not have any underling medical conditions that are not under control. This include cardiac issues like atrial fibrilation and hypertension, as well as, depression, and PAIN. Make sure he is not taking any anitcholinergic medications (ex. benztropine, Benadryl, hydroxyzine, oxybutnin, and tri-cyclic anti-depressants. Non-medication approaches are walking or light exercise, music during meals and bathing. Make sure to establish and maintain and alliance with Dad.

If you want to go the medication route, there are a variety of medications that he can take. These medications are generally used to treat psychotic conditions and are referred to as 2nd generation anti-psychotics. Anti-psychotics by Brand Name inlude Abilify, Zyprexa, Seroquel, Risperdal. Please out to me (contact info in profile) for a Comprehensive Medication Review to identify and eliminate medication problems or for caregiver support!

Source: Geriatrics at Your Fingertips (2015 Edition)

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