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How can I visit my mom without her getting upset when I leave?

Everytime I visit my Mom in assisted living she tries to leave with me saying she is going home, if I try to correct her she becomes very agitated.
Status: Open    Nov 28, 2014 - 01:31 AM

Dementia

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Dec 21, 2014 - 11:37 AM

One of the techniques that you might try is leaving quietly. I would recommend working with the care partners to involve your mom in an activity as your visit comes to a close. This may be a scheduled activity or even a next meal. As her attention transfers to that activity, you can bow out gracefully without as much agitation. This has been an effective technique for many families at our community, especially for residents who have memory loss.

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Dec 01, 2014 - 08:51 PM

My mom was the same way for about the first year and a half after she moved into assisted living. When it was time for me to leave, I would make sure that she knew that I was coming back and would see her again - and I kept my promise to return. In those days I was visiting her every day. As her dementia progressed, I could tell her that she was just staying there for the night, and I would be back again soon. I would take her to my home a few times each year. Don't correct her - re-direct her.

As time progressed, Mom's dementia got a bit worse, and she stopped asking to leave with me. Today, 3 years later, she's in memory care and barely turns her head when I leave, nor does she ask for me anymore. Hopefully, your Mom is well and just needs a bit of help. Enjoy her while you can because once they are gone... well, you know the rest.

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