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Why does my Mom no longer like me?

Why does my mom think I'm always the "bad guy" in every situation?
Status: Open    Sep 10, 2014 - 08:22 PM


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Sep 20, 2014 - 10:02 PM

Unfortunately this seems to be common in dementia. My husband went from being the favorite son to an outcast in his mom's eyes even though he had been helping her out for years. The people closest are often the targets for their frustration, anger and paranoia. Just keep reminding yourself that it's the dementia talking, you are not the bad guy!


Jan 18, 2015 - 04:23 PM

You are the "bad guy" because your mother views you as the strong one in the family who has always been willing to make decisions. that makes you "it".

If you are dealing with dementia, The Alzheimer's hotline people told me to just back away for awhile. I would not call for a week. Soon she started calling me and I would chat about benign things like the weather.

If you have siblings, they could be feeding the fire...that happened to me until recently when everyone got on the same page and started acting like adults again. We all started giving her the same message. She is now in assisted living.

Feb 01, 2015 - 08:08 PM

My Mother goes through periods where I'm just the meanest person alive because I tell her no "ALL THE TIME". In my mothers case what she remembers the most are the bad times. She has always been stubborn and independent and feels that I'm trying to control her. What works for me is bath time and a long massage with lotion and warm towels and telling her I'm so so glad that I'm her daughter. The longer the massage the more she appreciates me and tells me thank you for being her daughter. There's nothing to be called a bad guy in that situation. Oh, and tell her how pretty her skin or legs or whatever looks while massaging her. Compliments are something everyone enjoys.

Best of luck
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