Ask a Question

How do I remind Mom that Dad has died?

Mom keeps forgetting that Dad has died, do I tell her the truth or just change the subject?
Status: Open    Sep 07, 2014 - 01:46 PM


Do you have the same question? Follow this Question

2 answers

APFM Staff Answers

Apr 21, 2015 - 07:38 AM

Losing someone is often a devastating event. Due to your mother’s memory loss she is unable to remember that she has lost her husband. When someone “reminds her” or tells her daily that her husband has passed away, it is (to her) as if she is hearing it for the first time. This is just a repeated tragic event for her. With dementia patients it is often good to just redirect them to another subject or to let them know that he is “not here right now”. Having a family member with dementia forget that their spouse is gone is more troublesome for the family than anything. They simply are at the stage where reminding them is more trauma than good.



Sep 07, 2014 - 02:02 PM

When Grandma was first starting to forget that Grandpa had died we would correct her but as her dementia worsened it really freaked her out to be corrected & told he was dead. It worked best for us to say he would be back soon or something like that. A few minutes later she generally forgot that she'd even asked about him. I don't like lying to her but I like scaring her even less.
Answer this question

Recently Active Members